For now I'm stuck

Hi again!

Its officially May, and I cant believe I skipped last month, sorry.

So, today, if I was to tell you what is it like now, pull up a chair, and a glass of your finest,
because I don't think it is possible to sum up how I feel in 5 words or less.

Truthfully, I figured life would be so much more nicer, now that I do not have to worry about school, and just do what I gotta do, but its not. I don't know how long this "stuck" feeling is supposed to last after you graduate. Ahh! I really just wanna scream.

I'm not going to back down on what I preach, because the whole point about getting any piece of perspective across towards anyone else is, keeping it real. I can't speak for no one, but myself.
So here I am, talking about ME, how narcissistic. Yep, but something has to be done. 

So how do I define being stuck? I am at that point of lost, that moment of panic, where I do not know
what to do. In college it was easy, I had a concrete objective, I needed to graduate and I knew what I had to do to pass the class. I had a major, and now that I can see my degree sitting pretty on the table,
I'm wondering how I can use it. Now, granted, I know what "job" I could go into. I could teach. I could be a journalist. But right now, those options do not seem as interesting to me. Cue the flashing red lights, my plan A is no longer part of the plan. So I've been dreaming and thinking, and noticing a problem. I'm not living, how sad huh? According to my Dad, I was born at 6 months, I was a preemie,
that was very close at not making the mark. I never knew that til a month ago. But it made me remember all I have gone through to get to this point. So, I couldn't believe that in all my years, where I have struggled academically, and went through so much bs with overcoming my hardships, that I was a child that beat the odds.

It is funny and remarkable that this piece of information makes me feel like I've made it out alive and should continue, though it is uncertain at this point where I will go, being stuck is just a road block.

I have an idea about what I want to do next, however, fear keeps giving me reasons not to do it.
There is something I have in mind, it is a different dream, and its perhaps outlandish. I will let you in on that soon. For now friends, I truly understand what its like to feel like you are in a place you do not want to be, that you feel you should be somewhere else, that you need newness and diversity. Just remember, change can happen anytime, but if it does not happen like you want it to, all is left is to be patient, and that in itself is one of the greatest challenges in this life.

There is still hope dear Reader!

CC